Listen!!

 Huh, ok...I am as guilty as charged on this topic. I have never listened to anything. I don't mean only in terms of taking advice, but in general, listen to anything anyone is saying (weathers it is a conversation with a friend, a dialogue, the lyrics of a song, etc). I have never given full attention to it and most times I start thinking on how to respond. My extrovert self pushes me to catch onto something I can relate to and respond with a story. Thanks to my heightened senses off late, I have started to listen more. I still talk a lot but you can make out a difference.

Some of the songs that I used to just listen, makes completely different sense to me. Even the beats, tempo, pictures, etc say lot more than what I saw before.

Like the one from Rocket Singh - Pankhon Ko has 'Uljhe nahi toh kaise suljhoge, Bikhre nahi to kaise nihkroge' which is such a different way of looking at life. It is not all doom and broken self can be a good thing. You can rebuild in the way you want without the baggage of the past 🙌

Or Gully Boy - Ek Hee Raasta 'Apne saare janam chalte hai, Sar jhukaye huye band aankhein kiye aur yeh dukh liye, Mod jo dekha tha uspe mudd jaate hum, Toh najaane kahan tak pahunch paate hum'. How many of us regret not taking a chance on something and think about it for the rest of our life. 

Baaluvantha Hoove - 'Baala Kadanadalli Baravasegalu Beku, Naale Nannadennuva Nambikegalu Beku', 'Illi Eesabeku Iddu Jayisabeku'. How important are belief and self-love 💗

'Imagine there's no countries, It isn't hard to do, Nothing to kill or die for And no religion, too. Imagine all the people, Livin' life in peace. You may say I'm a dreamer, But I'm not the only one'. Given the current world, can you just imagine this 😥

Same with the conversations I have with people. I feel I can finally hear them. 

When a close friend sits next to me without interacting, just be silent. I understand he is going through something and just needs me to be around without saying a word. The silence speaks more and gives him the strength to face what is happening or open up about it.

When one of my colleague resigned, I did not get angry but heard it was her 'family' who decided for her. Something I have learned cannot be influenced by me. It did annoy me but at the end of the day, she has to do what works for her.

I am also understanding when to be tough and not put on a nice guy face all the time. No longer a crowd-pleaser I guess 😈

When someone is annoyed or angry, I am able to try and read between the lines (have a long way to go and get better) to see what is causing this grief. I'm ok to have those difficult conversations and be vulnerable.

Listening is so liberating (and overwhelming at times), to make sense of things and not just keep talking. More than anyone else, I want to listen to myself which is a first. If you see the writing, there are many I's which indicates I'm not hiding behind some generic shit anymore 😜

Cheers to listening, from our heart with no preconceived notions about anything. As Annavaru said, 'Ninna Haladhi Kannali Janaraneke Nee Noduve, Manada Donku Kaanade Jagavaneke Nee Dooruve'.

There are thousands of songs, millions of conversations I want to have again with my newfound superpower, LISTENING!

Views!!

 Kiddo has been behind me to start a youtube channel for some time and wants to be a famous YouTuber! He watches so many youtube channels and goes on and on about the famous ones like Mr. Beast, Unspeakable, etc and how many followers and views they have. That made me think if all this youtube stuff is good for kids, will it make them happy or will they become more anxious comparing how many views/followers they have. The more I thought the scarier it looked, what if they get carried away or what if they get disappointed, etc. I did not have something to compare with my past experience to draw some conclusions. Probably it was similar to being the center of attraction or the most famous person back in our days, again couldn't relate much to that. That is where the problem is, MY PAST EXPERIENCE, MY VIEWS!! 

Many have been trained to look at the experience and define what success or failure is. Most of us keep going back to them and stick to our success mantra. So much so, we are not ready to accept new things or look at them from a different perspective. That is probably why many spiritual gurus talk about looking at things from a far-off view. I think Sadguru said not to teach anything to kids. Why would a grumpy adult try to teach a kid who is super happy and does not give a damn about their surroundings? It should be the other way around isn't it 😉

That's when I started to look at kiddo's youtube requests differently and help him make videos. I did manage to talk to him about being original, not doing stupid games videos, and somehow convinced him to do cooking videos. Even if he does not get many views/followers, he will learn one of the most important life skills, Cooking!! On the journey, we both spend time doing something together and have a father-son bonding time. TBH, I am enjoying this and learning to cook (even though it is not as regular as planned) and contributing to my house in a very small way. I also realized how difficult it is to make a video and the effort needed to put everything together. It is a good project management learning for the kid too. There is a long way to go and I have made a start.

This topic also reminded me about how views work in most of these channels. Read about how views are counted irrespective of incognito or anonymous login. I have been blogging for the last few months and did not realize that the blogger site does not count views and we need to look at the web version (blogspot.com). And the best thing is that Blogspot counts views even if you are viewing it, mad isn't it!! I don't know how many of them did not realize it and missed out on those previous views 😂

I need to remember to share the correct link https://raysofravi.blogspot.com/ when I want the world to read my writing 😆

Hampi .....travel through time!

 Historical places have always been very fascinating to me, whether it is the cobbled streets of Rome, the narrow gully's in Varanasi, or the ruins of Hampi. There is something about Hampi that keeps drawing me to visit. Just imagining the grandeur of the place and the size of the city makes me go WOW! 

Friday was one such day when I suddenly decided to visit Hampi for the weekend with my family. I made quick hotel bookings and started early at 6.20am. Thanks to the insane traffic at Gurguntepalya (everyone in North Bangalore knows what a nightmare it is at any point of the day), closed Peenya flyover and the stupidity of traffic police below the flyover (no changes were made to the traffic lights, 30secs out of 135 was given to the diverted national highway traffic creating massive delays), we managed to get out of Bangalore after 90 mins (normally a 30 min ride) 😟 The drive after that was amazing on one of the best roads in India. Managed to reach Hampi at 12 noon with a breakfast break at a not-so-exciting restaurant. 

Thanks to my previous visits, I almost know all the monuments and temples really well and don't even need a guide or a map to find them. We went straight to the Yantrodharaka Anjaneya temple which has become one of my favorites of late. There is a divine feeling in that place and the views of the lake, rocky mountains, and Anjanadri Parvata are simply superb. 

The afternoon heat was taking its toll, we quickly decided to check-in and rest for a couple of hrs. Thanks to my over enthu ignorance, I had managed to book the hotel for March instead of Feb. After a few calls to the booking website call center, they managed to change to dates to Feb (temporarily, there is a long story of what did not happen properly and how I escaped 😬). Kiddo went for a quick swim before his bath and some simple food from the hotels restaurant gave us the energy to walk.

We headed back to Hampi and started with the Lotus Mahal. You have to imagine the Queens Palace at full glory overlooking the beautiful Lotus Mahal, I could think of exotic birds, fountains, flowering plants, gorgeous ladies,  etc that must have made the place heavenly. The Elephant Stables next to It must have looked majestic with 11 elephants resting inside. 

The next stop was the Krishna temple, Krishna Market & Pushkarni. The size of the market suggests how busy it must have been back in the day. Our movies do not do justice to period drama with everyone dressed similarly in typical clean clothes, etc. I'm sure there must have been some rawness to it with rags, skimpy, nude, etc with people traveling from all over the world.

The grandeur of the Ugra Narasimha Statue has a calming effect on me. I felt tiny in front of the status and the Badavi Linga.

We just drove past the Mahanavami Dibba as it was hot and I had planned to watch the sunset from the Vijaya Vitthala Temple. And man it was worth it. To avoid polluting vehicles, the management has EVs shuttling people for the 1.5Kms drive. As there was a long queue, I convinced wifey and kid to walk and they hated me for that. I kinda enjoy that walk and let our imagination go wild thinking how the market streets would have been 600 yrs ago selling gold, diamonds, pearls, and precious stones literally roadside shops. Thanks to the Icecream cart, we got some energy and hired a guide to talk about the most famous temple of the Vijaynagar Empire. 

How the Vitthala statue from Pandarapura was kept in the temple for 70+ yrs, Krishnadevaraya getting the stone chariot done inspired by Konark (one of the best places to visit for an Indian History buff) after winning his war over the Kalinga's and getting an Idol from Thirupathi. The feel of the place in incredible with the musical pillars, intricate carvings, layers of foundation with carvings, bangle design, lamps, and roof pegs for flower decoration. The fully decorated temple with music and dance must have been a mesmerizing experience. The sunset just added to the experience. It is definitely worth the travel and long walk. The stone chariot itself has a charm after 600 ys and some of the parts missing. 

We were tired enough to go to the hotel and crash. But the mindset while traveling is to make full use of the time and we headed to the small hippy street next to Virupaksha temple for dinner. Most restaurants in this area serve amazing European food thanks to the travelers who stay there for months. After quick shopping (there is always energy for shopping) we settled in a German bakery/restaurant. 

A simple place with quirky decor, low seating with bedding made us feel relaxed. The food that followed was simply superb. The Spanish omelet, Pasta, Mushroom Toast were simple, yummy and filling. We then drove around the ruins taking some nightlight pics.  

I managed to get a quick shower before hitting the bed absolutely knackered after 15k steps walk in the heat.

The next morning we got ready and after a quick breakfast, we headed to Anjanadri Betta, the birthplace of Lord Hanuman. It has become a famous temple in the last few years, I remember visiting it when there was not much hype. One of my office friends and his wife accompanied us to the temple. The 575 steps to climb are taxing especially after a meal but the view help you relax. It took 20 mins for us to reach the top and the views of rocky mountains with paddy fields in the valley are breadth taking. The temple itself is very simple and definitely feels special for a Hanuman fan like me. We walked around the mountain to enjoy the views and climbed down. I just showed the Anegundi area from the car as we did not have much time to explore. 

After a quick checkout from the hotel, I visited the Virupaksha temple. We then visited the Underground Shiva temple which is one of the hidden gems of Hampi. The low-lying temple is always filled with water and is cool throughout the year. It stopped being a place of worship thanks to the destruction but still has a divine vibe to it. We then walked through the Queen's bath which would have been a royal swimming pool for the royal ladies. I thought that should be the last scene in my head and decided to start for Bangalore. 

But me being me stopped at a local pot maker to buy a few clay pots for my plants. I just can't ignore plants and pots. We also picked up a pot for curd and a small one for cooking. The next-door Muslim shopkeeper helped the older pottery lady to sell me more things and suggested what is good for cooking. Just made me realize that we Indians are still the same united lot helping each other irrespective of what the politicians try to do. It felt very good giving them business which according to them was a bargain 😆

After a heavy lunch stop at Hospet with cousin's family, we had 5 min break to see the scale of the Tungabadhra dam.

The nonstop drive of 4 hrs 40 mins got me back home. Thanks to the detour to avoid the Nelamangala Peenya traffic, we did not get a single traffic light as we drove through Hesadgatta. Overall it was a quick weekend getaway to 'Travel Through Time'.

Every visit to Hampi has made me glad and sad. I always wondered why would anyone destroy such an incredible city and such beautiful monuments. Thinking of it, it is still happening in the world and humans do not want to learn from history. but TBH, there was something different this visit, probably thanks to the way I think now. I could imagine how things could have been if Hampi was not destroyed, it might have been a better ruin but nowhere close to what it was during its hay days. I could just stare at it and imagine how it was back in Krishnadevaraya's time and it was amazing scenery. No matter how much they tried to destroy, my imagination could see it in a grand way (probably way more beautiful than what it actually was) and make me fall in love with the place again. There is lots more to explore and imagine in Hampi. It is a must-visit place for everyone.

I would want to leave you all with the below pic. Even though the Hampi is a ruin, the sun will never set on the Vijayanagar Empire as it is living in our vision, our imagination 👌

Covid Situation...Mental!!

 The last few weeks have been crazy in terms of Covid spread in India with almost everyone getting symptoms like fever, cough, fatigue, etc. My house was no different with mom catching fever and then the kiddo. One thing we did bother doing was the covid test as we assumed it is +ve and took precautions.

Managing to get a booster dose for parents gave the confidence of fighting it and mom recovered in a couple of days. I had managed not to get any symptoms for the past 2 yrs thanks to my luck and an active lifestyle. It looked the same this time also. Even though I had an itchy throat for a month, nothing else happened. 

Everything changed early last week. A sudden pile of work changed my exercise and work routine. Tuesday especially was so busy, I had to work on 3 presentations/reports that were all critical and needed coordinating with a lot of people. The first time I felt very stressed in the last few months and my brain was in overdrive. I somehow managed to complete it after 16 hrs straight slogging but it had a toll on me. I was so high on adrenaline, my brain did not want to rest even after 11pm. I ended up with no sleep and there it was, fever and all covid symptoms. I was so brain fucked for the next couple of days and did not find the mental strength to do anything. My childhood hallucinations due to fever were back after many years.

That is when I realized the connection between your mental strength and covid. For 2 yrs I stayed clear of it and within 1 day I managed to catch it. Stress plays a way bigger part in this. No wonder wave 2 had so many casualties. People were scared of it and going to ICU made it worse. I have spent a couple of months visiting ICU when dad was ill a few yrs back and the atmosphere there is pretty grim. 

Imagine being in ICU during covid:

- things change around even day. Some recovering which puts doubt on your situation and some dying which scares the shit out of you

- lack of oxygen is like someone is strangling you

- mad rush which means no one is talking to you and counseling which is very important

- no family or friends around to comfort you

- no phone or anything to connect with the outside world

This is a super combination for disaster and that is what we saw. Thousands of died many of whom were young healthy people. Most last rights were done without their loved ones bidding them goodbye 😭

My biggest takeaway from last week is to look at mental stress and physical fitness. Not being in the right frame of mind, beating up yourself, overthinking, overworking especially creating stress can escalate the smallest of health issues. Being honest to yourself, speaking your mind, being grateful toward what you have, and accepting being vulnerable has helped me to deal with my demons better. I might have pissed off a few people and lost credibility, but I know they will come around. I still managed to be completely low last week and actually let it happen naturally. Sometimes accepting a low period and going through it is important to feel OK, resisting is not always good. 

Overall, trying to be happy does help a lot and it is ok if there are days when you are not. It does not define your life, things will change. If you are feeling low, do talk to ur loved ones and people who care for you. You are very important to many people, let them help you and take care of you. Hold on to the smallest of things that make you happy and grow it. The key is to get mentally strong and feel good about your life. One thing covid has taught is having clear air in your lungs is a good enough reason to be happy and calm.

It takes me back to a few words I heard last year:

Choti si zindagi hai, Har baat par kush raho,

Jo chehra pass na ho, Uski awaaz mein kush raho,

Jo laut kar nahi aane wale, Uski yaad mein kush raho,

Kal kisne dekha hai, Apne aaj me kush raho!! 

Covid will pass if you face it with calm and mental strength. Love thyself, you are worth it 💓💓